We're just going to take a quick break from "The Life After" series and talk about the below for awhile.
Some of you may have asked yourself why I have removed the quote from the top of my blog. My explanation is as follows:
This is my year. Every single year previous to this one, has been a year of doing things for the praise, acceptance and expectations of others. In 2011, I am trying an experiment. I am going to do things only if I want to. I am going to be happy by not letting outward influences define who I am.
I am not going to be afraid of my sexuality or my body-image anymore. People will have to accept me for me, and not for who I am attracted to or what I look like.
I am going to stop seeking the praise of others just because it's what "I'm supposed to do", or what "is required of me".
I am choosing to live my life the way I want to.
I am making this decision because I want to see if I will be able to see a difference in the quality of life and the life experiences that I have. I want to see if my outlook of the world, people, and most importantly--myself, will change. I want to see, that my doing what makes me happy and stop worrying about what other people think will help me be a better, smarter, nicer, kinder, and more happy person.
That is why it is my year.
Love it! I wish you luck. Doing things to please others is such a hard habit to break. So hard that I've hardly tried! I'm sure you'll feel much better with this new attitude.
ReplyDeleteThis is an interesting idea that makes me wonder what you mean. Is this more of a 'I'm not going to let other people define my happiness' thing, or is it a 'I am going to do whatever i want no matter what you say'. They are both very different. On the one hand, it is important to find happiness in your individuality, but if we all did only things we wanted to do and only things that were comfortable, then we would never grow and there would not be much love in the world. It's also important to listen to outside influences when they are promptings of the Spirit or good counsel from a caring person... I am glad you are making a decision to be happy though, that is important.
ReplyDeleteFindingmyway, Thanks for the support! I sure hope that I can keep up this new mode of thinking. It's gonna be tough, I think. But I hope I can do it!
ReplyDelete@ Tim--You're right. It is a little confusing. What I mean is that "I'm not going to let other people define my happiness." Of course, there are lines that cannot be colored out off--and I intend to stay within them. It's going to prove to be an interesting year with this new mindset. I am sure that you will read all about it. Thanks, Tim. Love ya, buddy!
ReplyDeleteSweet! Can't wait to read about it all! :)
ReplyDeleteTough order to fill- but wonderful. I have definitely come a long way in my efforts to stop living for other people or being ashamed of myself. But every now and then I still care what someone may think. A couple months ago I had to buy Brokeback Mountain to do a paper on it for class. I chose the film of course, but I had to ask for help to find it at Best Buy. I felt embarrassed, like I needed to explain it was for a paper. But the truth was, I liked the movie and that is why I picked it. What was the worst thing this stranger could think? "You're gay?" So what? I AM! It made me so angry that I felt ashamed.
ReplyDeleteThey didn't have it of course (I'm sure it isn't popular in Utah County) so then I had to go somewhere else and buy the "Collectors Edition." haha.
This is excellent! The best of luck to you :)
ReplyDeleteAlways remind yourself of your resolution. I find it's really easy to slip into the "pleasing others" mindset. It's a comfortable place.
But I think you'll find a lot of satisfaction and happiness in your resolution. It might be tough, but it'll be rewarding!