Last night, as her and I walked aimlessly through the frozen food section of Macy's in Provo, I brought up the subject of Frankenstein's monster. I told her how much I related to him. He exclaims that he once felt like Adam, "but now is the fallen angel". His only hope is to walk aimlessly around the earth, finding happiness in nothing until death is his only release.
I told her that I felt connected to the monster. I felt that I had been created like Adam, only to become the fallen angel. She stopped.
"Why do you keep doing this to yourself?"
"What?" I asked.
"You keep focusing on the bad things. On how you feel sorry for yourself. You don't focus on the happy parts of your life."
This came as quite a shock to me. I thought I was always a pretty happy person.
She continued. "You don't need to always be saying, 'Why me? Why did God do this to me?' Why can't you accept it and move on?"
I was going to try to explain myself, but stopped. I realized that I need to move on and focus on the good things that come from being gay and not the bad things. So, in lieu of her proposal, here are the top ten things I think are great things that come from being gay...or attracted to the same gender...or...whatever you want to call it.
These are in no particular order.
(1) Being able to watch Disney movies and have no other excuse other than you enjoy them. (Or because fact have the hunkiest cartoon characters around)
(2) I realize that I can never do things alone. I must always rely on a higher power.
(3) I can be a Cuddle Slut.
(4) I have learned how to love people for who they truly are, and not what the world expects them to be. I don't have to rely on the judgments of others. I can meet that person and then judge for myself. If Christ loves everyone, then...by golly, I can too.
(5) I can listen to Lady Gaga as loud as I want without having to explain myself. I also can try and covert those who don't believe in Our Lady of Gaga.
And...I'm too tired to think of the next five...so I'm gonna ask for help:
What do you guys/gals think is the best part of being gay? Or, what makes you the most happy by being gay?
You have a trump card in all matters of taste. People assume because you are gay "you know".
ReplyDeleteWhen your "fag hag" gets married, you can still hang out with her and go out to lunch with her and it isn't a huge worry for the hubby. :)
ReplyDeleteI mean, all the straight guy friends have to act all weird now.
You just tell me to stop trying to grab at your balls. It is awesome.
...even though you never mention me on your blog like you have Clarise and boskers...I'm very bitter.
Not having to watch sports.
ReplyDeleteIf this blog post were a Facebook note, I'd Like (with a capital L) it for the Davey Wavey cameo alone. :)
ReplyDeleteAs a gay guy, I don't have to worry about feminine shenanigans or emotionality.
ReplyDeleteThe people I think are hot *can* walk shirtless in the park.
You never have to worry about unplanned pregnancy.
You don't have to worry about "Men are from Mars," etc. We're all from the same planet. We are easier to understand.
I could keep going!
Very good Frankenstein allusion. I might have to 'borrow' it someday.
ReplyDeleteAlso, good choices on the princes.