Putting Myself Out There

Lend me your ears (I'll give them back, I swear)

I sent an email to the boy, about one hour later I received a text message informing me that he had read the email and was "highly dissapointed". I didn't text him back. And you know what? I'm not sad at all. Although, I did have to have one of my friends force me to push the "send" button. I hate making people feel bad, and I am sure that this boy felt a little sad after receiving the email.

But, I feel a lot better. Looking back, I can see that I was just a little twitterpated, and because of that twitterpatedness, I was seeing the world and this boy through rose-colored glasses, which clearly skewed what was really going on. After I was able to take off the glasses, I noticed that the boy only wanted one thing: what all boys want.

Which makes me sad. This boy was one of the apparently few normal gay LDS men out there. But, then...of course, he really was just like all the others. *sigh*

Oh, well. I am ready to move on. I am ready to throw myself out there. It has been one crazy week, but a good one. I learned a lot about myself and what I really want. I am surprised and proud of myself for standing up for my own morals and beliefs. I did not think that when it came down to it, I would be able to. Well, I proved myself wrong.

And it felt great.