Yes, you all read that correctly. I have a date. Not this week, maybe not next week (I am so busy, even for a date), but for sure the week after that. I am all tingly inside, warm, bubbly, scared, nervous, want to vomit every time I think about it, and smiley all day.
His name is Mark. We met...ugh...online through Connexion. However, Mark is not the type of guy who just wants to get in my pants or I in his pants. We have discussed this many times over chat, text and phone. Oh, oh, Mark does not hook up. (Yay for Kelly!) He seems like such a great guy. He still goes to church, wears his garments, is one year older than me, has graduated from BYU and is overall a very highly moral man, which to me is very attractive. He doesn't watch porn, doesn't swear, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, doesn't go clubbing, he loathes the stereotypical gay subculture....all in all, he's a normal gay man! Like me! Normal gay people do exist!
So, we are planning to go on a date sometime at this organic restaurant in Springville. I am excited, but nervous. Here's the clincher for me: Mark says that looks really don't matter to him; it's all about who you are. For me, (maybe I am just a shallow idiot) I find that hard to believe. I don't know, I just feel when we finally meet, he will see me, and the little extra weight I carry and...we will still go on our date and have fun...but that might be the end of it. Am I thinking too much here?
How can I feel better about my body image? Seriously, though, if Mark honestly did not care what I looked like, I would be so much more confident. I hope so.
Any advice to prepare me for this momentous occasion in my life?
P.S. Bishop L reads this blog. Um, surprise?
Congratulations! I remember feeling excited, proud, and electric the first time a guy asked me out. I finally had that feeling everyone else (straight) had when they dated.
ReplyDeleteI don't believe the "doesn't care about looks" claim. That's a nice thing to say though. I've never met you in person, but I don't think you have anything to worry about. You're cute!
Its tough bro to be able to feel comfort about that. Just give him the benefit of the doubt though.
ReplyDeleteYay! Congrats Andy. I remember my first date... wow that was months ago. And there hasn't been another since. :( I'm still new to the whole connexion thing so I don't even have any hits yet. And to find a gay guy with standards. It gives me hope.
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